Yeah... We cannot judge any position in life... sometimes we are the sword which hurts, sometimes we are the shield which protects... I cannot say in which position I am right now. I am feeling like the sword which pierces the eyes, cross the ways and gets in where wasn't call it for. I am feeling like the shield which protects the heart, that one which was in pieces a months ago and cannot be cut again...not now, not like this. I am feeling confusing, because being the shield I cannot be the sword and being the sword how come I will be the shield? But anyway, sword or shield, the damaged must have been done and I cannot see a sign of a blue horizon from where I am. From the position I have taken. And the fear that I had to put everything in words, was completely fair and now that I had made myself spoken some of those words, God... how I regret... Because the "verbalization"( ok only shakespeare can create new words?) of this dumb-deaf-blind feelings are the certainty that they are there. "Verbalizing" these feelings, we are saying a YES , that we may not be prepare to. We are letting in something we can't even be sure that is true and even fair. By listening our mouths saying what our heart were denying we are becoming the agent of something that we were so afraid of.